Amy Karr

We have BIG news! We are adopting a child!

As you may know, adoption-related costs can easily total up to $35,000 or more. We are taking advantage of tax credits and grants and special adoption loans as we can, but we have also started this crowdfunding campaign, with a goal of $15,000, as part of our funding process.

We hope that by inviting you into this process (whether you support us financially or in other ways), you will see yourself as part of the community we hope to build around our new child.

This is our adoption story…

Twelve years ago two little boys came to church with their grandma. They needed a place to stay for the night. We agreed to bring them home with us. Actually, Johnie agreed without really asking me and I was pretty frustrated. But they were sweet kids and it was obvious they had had a hard time and I quickly softened.

One night turned into four. That final day their family asked us if we would keep them through a fictive kin type placement while they worked to regain custody. Having been with these children through the week we had serious concerns about potential abuse and neglect. We felt like their family hadn’t been honest with us about their situation and we didn’t want to bring the state into our rocky relationship. We were afraid they would try to take advantage of us and cut corners in the custody process.

While we didn’t feel comfortable saying yes to Devon and Skylar, I realized there might be other kids I could help. We began the process of becoming certified to foster in the state of Kansas.

We took the classes, filled out the paperwork, got the references and prepared a bedroom. With nothing left to do but sign the final contract and become active, Johnie confessed that he wasn’t ready.

I knew we both had to be on board if we were going to bring traumatized children into our home, so we put our efforts on hold.

I was blessed with a job with Kansas Children’s Service League and had an outlet for my passion to help children and families while I waited for Johnie.

Our lives changed gears when we leaped at the opportunity to move back to Kentucky. I somehow wound up with my dream job and we were basking in what was possibly the best season of my life so far.

Then I began having some strange health issues. While I was pursuing answers with a group of doctors, we watched an adoption video a friend shared and it pricked Johnie’s heart. We decided to look into foster care again once I was well.

Everything came crashing down when I was diagnosed with lupus in the final weeks of my grandfather’s life. Reeling, we decided to make some major changes that involved me leaving my career and the two of us moving closer to our church family. We actually chose to live in the same house with some missionary friends for a few months while they prepared to serve overseas and we looked for a home to buy in our new community.

We moved into our new home with plans to contact a local foster care agency once we got settled in. But less than a month later we learned I was pregnant.

Matthias is the most wonderful gift I didn’t want. The Lord saw us through a difficult, scary pregnancy and against all odds gave us a perfectly healthy baby.

Johnie and I were so traumatized by the pregnancy and birth we decided Matthias would be our only biological child (unless the Lord feels very strongly otherwise). Though it is unclear if I would ever be able to have another pregnancy (viable or not), we both felt pretty confident we didn’t want to take any chances.

I decided to focus just on Matthias for his first year. Motherhood was more fulfilling and joyful than I dreamed possible. After his birthday, I was feeling conflicted. I didn’t feel as drawn to fostering as I had before him (after having a baby, how could I imagine sending one back home?), but I also wasn’t sure we were ready to adopt. We decided to give it more time.

We made some renovations to our house to move Johnie’s office downstairs and free up a bedroom. And after scrolling through a website of Kentucky kids available for adoption we decided to inquire about a little boy we thought would fit well with our family. It was April 6, 2018. My beloved late grandmother’s birthday.

Before we even had our first informational meeting we learned that boy was no longer available for adoption. But we decided to go ahead and start the process so we’d be ready for the next kid.

The certification process was longer than I expected, just two weeks shy of a full year. Most of that was spent waiting for the state to complete various requirements on their end.

In that time I fell in love with other available kids who were also adopted. All bittersweet, some more heart-wrenching than others. Then in March of this year we learned we were officially certified and began inquiring about children on AdoptUSKids.org.

We were encouraged by our social worker and others to be open to foster care, even though we felt pretty settled on adoption. So in July we said yes to our first call to foster.

We welcomed a delightful eleven month old girl into our home. I can’t imagine a more positive foster experience. It felt like my years of waiting had finally been repaid. And I had a chance to fully live into the message I believed and shared through my work in child abuse prevention.

There are evil people who do evil things, but generally most parents are not bad. They just need a little help for a season to keep their child safe and loved. I was able to develop a relationship with the birth family and felt genuinely happy for their reunification. Thankfully, they have remained in touch with us.

While this experience was overwhelmingly positive, despite our best efforts to prepare and protect him, Matthias didn’t understand how a friend could live in our house for several weeks only to leave one day with very little contact afterward.

On top of that, the two of them together had been more cuteness and sweetness overload than I could handle. I knew from that first night that she was not my child, but I also got a glimpse of how beautiful it could be for us to permanently add a baby to our family.

At the same time we were meeting with seemingly endless roadblocks and frustrations with our efforts to adopt an older (than Matthias) child from the foster care system.

So Johnie and I decided to begin looking into private infant adoption.

Newborn babies are my favorite people and I felt like I had missed out on the newborn experience with Matthias due to complications with his birth and my health.

We had thought we might adopt, but assumed it would be in a few years, after we had another child settled into our home. But with that process not going as we hoped and Matthias asking about his brother or sister nearly every day for more than a year, we felt compelled to push ahead with plans for a baby.

Now we are well into a second homestudy with a private agency. Once that is complete, we will begin presenting our family profile to potential birth moms until we are matched.

We are reading books, completing trainings and preparing our home and our lives for a new addition. It is a sweet and exciting time for us. I have hoped that the Lord will redeem my post-birth/newborn experience when we have our adopted child, but I have been surprised that He is already redeeming my pregnancy experience with joy and excitement and health I didn’t have the first time.

There are so many ways to support us. Biggest of all being prayers. It was the grace of God and people praying that carried me through my pregnancy and I’m sure it will be the same with this adoption.

If the Lord is leading you to support us financially, we would be so thankful for your donation.