We have some BIG news!
We’re hoping to adopt a sibling group from the Phillipines! We are both excited and nervous for what this process will look like as we know it will involve lots of highs and lows. We are trusting that the Lord will equip us to face whatever lies ahead. Our hope is that we will be able to raise a portion of our adoption fees by utilizing the tax deductible site Adopt Together. We know that each of you have your own financially responsibilities and we recognize and respect that. Our heart is not to make anyone feel obligated or pressured to give in any way. We simply want to invite you to walk alongside us in this journey if it happens to work for you and your family. We believe that it is important for us to be upfront with each of you in regards to how and why we plan to fundraise for our adoption. Our adoption from the Philippines will cost us a minimum of $26,000 for one child and goes up by at least $8,000 for each additional child (not including travel costs). We are personally open to adopting a sibling group of 2-3 kids. Our application has already been approved and our contract has been signed. The next step in our process will involve us paying $7,000 by the end of March. Once we’ve sent the first payment over, we will move into the home study phase of our adoption. We want to reassure you that we as a family are going to be financially invested in this adoption as this is a choice we are making. We want you to know that we will be committing to making sound decisions and finding places in our budget to cut back on in order to cover as much of our adoption as possible. With that said, we also believe it’s important that we are able to find a balance for our three boys to continue living life and make memories with them as we wait to bring our adopted children home. Not only do we appreciate whatever financial gift you are able to give but we greatly welcome your prayers as this will be another transition for our blended family and the kids we welcome into our home. We are so incredibly thankful for the people God has placed in our lives and we hope that by inviting you into this process that you will see yourselves as a part of the community we hope to build around our children as they grow up. Thank you!
Sweet Family and Friends,
Thank you for being patient with us the past couple of weeks as we took time to grieve, pray and regroup. We are so incredibly thankful for the investment each of you has made in our lives by being a part of our adoption journey whether through your financial donations, your prayers and/or emotional support. We truly didn't realize how receiving a "no" for a child would impact us. BUT we also believe that God uses and redeems everything and so we are choosing to trust Him as we make our way through this process. We want to make wise decisions, and openly share those decisions with each of you, since this is your investment as well. You have chosen to support and trust us as we go through this process and therefore, we needed to take time to sit back and decide if continuing with this agency was what is right. We have found that there are lots of opinions on whether or not we should switch agencies, pursue a different country through our agency or to stay in this agency. While we believe that God would work through any and all of those decisions, we believe that, for now at least, sticking with our agency and continuing to try and match with a child/children in the Philippines is the best option. (Should that change in the future, we will be sure to notify each of you :) ) With that said, we are requesting medical files and waiting on the Philippines for a response. This can take a couple of days or a couple of weeks. We feel refreshed and ready to move forward in this process after taking some time to pause and reflect. This is definitely a journey, and we are so thankful for your continued financial support and prayers. We love you all and will update you once we know more :)
With love,
The Langenfelds
Dear Friends and Family,
As many of you know, last week we were notified that the little girl we had waited for five months to see if we matched with was matched with another family. We wrestled with wondering why we had waited 5 months which is NOT normal (Usually 2-3 months) to receive a "no". We have talked and prayed with many people who graciously reminded us that that little girl deserved us for those five months. She deserved to wanted, longed for, dreamed about and prayed over. Every child deserves parents that would do that for them. God's heart is for the widows and the orphans and our time, energy and money was not wasted these past few months of waiting. We have grieved more than we would have ever thought possible in the last few days and yet are so thankful this precious girl is going to finally have a family to call her own and a place to call home. We are grateful that we got to be invested in her life and to love her, if only from a distance.
With that said, our agency has a strict policy of not adopting out of birth order and therefore has been very clear that they will not approve us to adopt a child or sibling group that has a child older than Jackson. This makes our options VERY limited as there are several sibling groups that we would love to pursue but we have felt stuck do to this policy. We want to be up front and let each of you know that we have had people confirm that our agency is known for not having disruptions. A disruption is when a child/children are removed from a family in the United States and sent back to their home country because of a situation or circumstance that caused it to not be the right fit for either the child or the family adopting. For that, we are extremely grateful to be with an organization that is well known for preventing this and who is also appreciated by the NACC in the Philippines. With that said, we have seen a sibling group on the website for months now. We actually have asked about them earlier this fall and we even placed a request for their medical profiles. We were originally denied earlier this week by our agency (again this is our agency's policy not the NACC), on the fact that they view Jackson as an "only child" since Hayden and Gavin are 10+ years older than him. We felt stuck and again with all the children who need a home, we felt helpless to not be able to pursue a few of these sibling groups. By God's grace, we have been talking with and connecting with people throughout the US who have encouraged us to fight for this sibling group. We even had a family suggest this EXACT sibling group to us. God is at work and the amount of things that were confirmed yesterday to keep trying for these boys. To graciously and courageously go back to our agency and explain why we feel led to pursue these children. We even know a family who adopted a child who knows this sibling group. (It was the same orphanage where she was adopted from). She was able to share their names with us prior to us even receiving their medical profiles! So brothers and sisters in Christ, today we ask you to pray with us. To pray that our agency would listen to the letter we wrote asking them to make an exception for us. Yesterday, they said they were willing to hear what we had to say where before it was just a no as a result of their policy. It gave us hope. The email with the letter has been sent and we have given them a timeframe in which we would like a response. If our request is denied, we have made the hard decision to look into switching agencies. Again, we do believe that this agency has good motives and a heart for these children. We know that they desire to place families and children into the best homes and to not allow for any disruptions. But we also know, that we serve a God who doesn't operate within a policy or box that we have created for Him. Sometimes, He leads us to take a leap of faith. We are anxious about having to redo paperwork, not knowing what will or will not transfer, the funds that we will need to come up with to transfer etc. BUT God isn't. This year wasn't wasted. We met these families that are now encouraging us to challenge the "system" BECAUSE of choosing this agency. It was because of this agency we were connected with our social worker who introduced us to these families that are now encouraging us to TRUST God and if these are truly the children we are meant to pursue, we need to push forward even if that means a little more time, a little more paperwork.
As it says in Matthew 18
The Parable of the Wandering Sheep
10 “See that you do not despise one of these little ones. For I tell you that their angels in heaven always see the face of my Father in heaven. [11] [a]
12 “What do you think? If a man owns a hundred sheep, and one of them wanders away, will he not leave the ninety-nine on the hills and go to look for the one that wandered off? 13 And if he finds it, truly I tell you, he is happier about that one sheep than about the ninety-nine that did not wander off. 14 In the same way your Father in heaven is not willing that any of these little ones should perish.
It is worth it to be ALL in for this next sibling group. They are worth leaving what feels safer, more comfortable, not as stressful and going after them. They deserve for us to be all in. They deserve to be pursued, cherished, fought for and held. So please, hang in there with us and if you are willing, pray for the agency to hear us. It would be a blessing to be heard and be able to finish what we started here if possible. But if not, you know what direction we will be headed in and we will also need prayers for that part of the adventure. Thank you for walking this road with us. Stay tuned :)
Oh sweet Friends and Family,
We FINALLY heard back from the Philippines about the child we were pursuing to adopt. After 4+ months of waiting for an answer, we received the dreaded phone call. We were not the family selected for this child. (Insert Deep Breaths Here). This season of waiting was/is incredibly challenging. It has been the hardest part of this journey for us BY far. Now add to the fact that we waited for all those months to hear a "No". No explanation of why we weren't chosen, just a no. Our agency was able to tell us that this was an incredibly difficult choice for the NACC (Philippines) to make as they had some wonderful families who applied to be matched with this child. The wonderful news is that this child will finally have a home and for that, we so grateful! This journey of adoption has taught us so much about juggling several emotions at once. We can hold happiness, joy and thankfulness in one hand as this child will now experience love from their forever family. In the other hand, however, we are able to hold the disappointment, sadness and grief knowing that this child will not experience this with us. It is amazing to me how much we can become "attached" to a child/children from only a couple pictures, reading their story and then spending time in prayer daily for the last several months over this child. Can I be honest and say that this week has been filled with disappointing news on several fronts-not JUST adoption. There has been three big things over the last couple of years we have been "waiting" on and all three came up this week (including adoption). All of them involved some level of grief, frustration and deep sadness. Due to the amount of time we have spent waiting on each one, I would say we are experience a deep level of grief and disappointment, however, we are CHOOSING to lean in to our community and to keep hoping. I kept telling Fred earlier this week, "I sure hope we don't get a response this week about adoption, because I can't handle another "no"". Sure enough, our answer came and that was exactly the answer we received. I held it together long enough to get off the phone with our agency only to melt into a puddle (okay maybe more like a river) of tears. See, Fred was on a business trip (of course that is how life goes HA!) but then, our sweet Jacks came over to my side and started rubbing my back and he spoke these gracious, loving, truth-filled words over me. He said " We have to keep going mom. There is a kid or kiddos our there who need us still. Keep going". Now, to be clear, this isn't a rescue story! We aren't here to save any child or children. We are not adopting to be superheroes. We have nothing to prove here. Please hear and know that that has never been our heart or intention when it comes to adoption, but there still was TRUTH in his statement. There is still a child or sibling group that we are going to love as our own! There are so many children out there who DESERVE to be chosen, cherished, welcomed, and deeply loved. We have to keep going! It would be so easy to give up. It would be easier to stop, because to be honest, we still have more fees, expenses, paperwork and time left to invest in this journey. We are not done yet. We are hopefully getting closer though. One step at a time. So tonight, we are still clinging to the hope that God placed this desire on our hearts. It is a burning passion that I have held since I was Jackson's age. And now, my 8 year old is speaking truth and grace over me and continuing to remind me to KEEP GOING! he is the exact age I was when adoption was placed on my heart and here he is fighting for it. So, what has been on your hearts sweet friends and family? What have you been waiting on for days, months, or like us, maybe even years? As hard as this update is to write, maybe someone needed to be reminded by a sweet 8 year old to KEEP GOING. It is going to be worth it. When we hold those sweet kiddos/kid in our arms, this will ALL have been worth it. When you see your victory, the battle you fought with grace, and tears will have been worth it. Keep holding on to hope! Keep moving forward! Keep the faith! Keep going!
Please feel free to be praying as we are in the process of reviewing profiles again and entering back into the referral process for a child or sibling group. Thanks to everyone who is reaching out and offering us support. We truly are grateful!
I can't think of a better time of year to be in a period of waiting than at the beginning of this Advent season. Advent is the season in which Christians prepare for the celebration of Jesus' birth and also the for the second coming of Christ. Advent comes from the Latin word "coming" or "arrival". (Now please don't get me wrong, I am not EXCITED about having to wait!) As I sit at my computer today (in my warm, cozy house looking out my window at the first Minnesota "snowstorm"), I can't help but wish I was writing to tell you that we have been matched with the child/children we applied to adopt. We are still waiting to hear back from the NACC (in the Philippines) to see if we have been chosen to be the "Forever Family". We are anxiously waiting the "arrival" or "home coming" of the child/children we will get to call our own. To be honest, Fred and I check our emails DAILY...okay, okay, I check mine almost HOURLY waiting to see if there is an email saying we have been CHOSEN to be the forever family. When people ask me what the hardest part of this process has been, I think it is the WAIT for the match. Yes, the paperwork is overwhelming (and there were many tears associated with that part of the process-if you would have asked me then, I 100% would have said that was the hardest part of the process HAHA!). The financial aspect of adoption is also incredibly stressful but God continues to provide through each of you and we are trusting He will keep providing as we get closer to our travel date. But this season, the one where we have already been waiting 64 days since we submitted our profile to be chosen (that is 640 times AT LEAST that I have checked my email hoping we would have an acceptance email) is the hardest thing for me personally. We can't DO anything while we wait. Now before some of you assume we aren't ACTUALLY doing anything ;) I want to reassure you that YES, we ARE praying, we ARE having conversations with our kiddos about what this next year may look like for us and how we will all need to be flexible and adapt, we DO continue to work on our trainings (we have 18 hours roughly left before we travel), we are trying to rest in the fact that God is a good, loving God working all things for our good, but it is in all honesty HARD when there is no paperwork to be able to distract our minds as we wait. Even looking at the number 64 days seems like years... There are multiple times a day where I am brought to tears (in a good, happy way) by either words of encouragement, a devotion or reading that hits home, an adoption story OR even meeting families at the Santa Experience (I am working there for the season to help save a little extra for our adoption etc.) who are from the Philippines or who have adopted. One family came in this weekend and the mom was in tears ordering pictures because they officially adopted their kiddos in September and this was their FIRST Christmas as a family of FOUR. She said it still hits her emotionally DAILY that she gets to be their mama. They were so sweet as they asked to order pictures that they could give to the birth parents. What?? You guys, here they are looking at their BEAUTIFUL kiddos and thinking of the birth family! I nearly started crying because they to know that adoption is a full spectrum joy and hope but again it is a story of loss and grief. They were thinking not only of themselves, but of the kids first family during this Christmas season that might not be "joy-filled" for everyone. As we wait, we know the answer could be that we are not chosen for this specific child/children. I am doing my best not to dwell on this, but it is hard not to think about from time to time. While I know our child/children are in the Philippines right now, a "You have not been chosen" during the Advent season could also be incredibly heartbreaking. We have fallen in love with the photos, the profile(s), the details that we know of and yet, we haven't even met yet. Jackson asks us everyday if we have been chosen yet. He's even been brought to tears during this wait. We are all invested...we are all in! Longing to be able to able to bring home a part of our family. A part of our family that wasn't made and born from us physically, but a family that is being shaped and formed in our hearts. I wonder if that is what Mary and Joseph must have felt to some extent? They were waiting on the miracle and promise of a child, not of their own making, but a very special promise non-the-less adn they CHOSE to accept the calling to raise a child that would restore creation and all the goodness God created. So here, another day of doing our best to REST in the promise we feel called to live out and fulfill, no matter what the cost. (That is easy to write and some of you are going to definitely need to remind us on our really hard days in the future that this IS EXACTLY where we are meant to be ;) ) So here it goes...a deep breath as we head keep walking through this season of waiting. We WILL celebrate the arrival of our Savior and the promise that He will come again for us. We WILL rest in THAT promise and hold tight to Him-no matter what the outcome is to this specific match. If we receive the YES we invite you to celebrate with us and if we receive the NO, we ask that we would be able to lean in to our community (that is YOU) and trust that we are supposed to KEEP going. We don't know when the "Home coming" will happen, but it's coming and each day we are one step closer...both to holding our "baby/babies" and one step closer to our Heavenly homecoming. Happy Advent Season to all of you! May you find rest, hope and joy in the midst of this season of waiting. Waiting with you!
Love,
The Langenfelds
Dear Friends and Family,
It has been awhile since we last posted an update and we have been quiet on social media as well as we have been busy doing some pretty extensive paperwork in the last couple of months. With that said, we wanted you to know where we are at as of today. :) We are currently in the process of completing our referral process. The referral process is a two week period of us completing paperwork (including transition plans) for a specific child/children that involves us submitting our family profile to the Philippines. The Philippines will review our profile and transition plan which will likely take 2-3 months. During this time, other families could have submitted their profiles for the same child/children so the Philippines reviews of the profiles and determines which family will likely be the best fit. (This process is known as being "matched" with the child/children.) At this time, we are not publicly announcing in our Adopt Together site whether it is a single child or sibling group that we are currently pursuing, We have chosen to do this because we have been advised that adoptive families often have to go through the referall process 2-3 times before they are chosen to be a match for a child/children. We know that for us personally, it has brought forth a lot of emotions not knowing if this child/children that we long to call "ours" will actually be matched with us. As hard as it is to pursue a child/children knowing that this may not be our "match", we are also excited to be at this point in the process. It is so wonderful to have so much of the paperwork completed and be at this place where we can breathe, rest and pray while we wait. We want you to know that while there may be silence from us in regards to updates for the next couple months, we believe God is still working and moving. We have nearly hit our goal of 22,500. We are beyond BLESSED by each of you who have helped us raise $18, 886 on this site and more donations have even been mailed to us personally. This has helped us cover many of our expenses for adoption up to this point. Currently, we are looking at around $6,750 for our next adoption expense prior to booking travel and assuming that we are matched with this referral. We are trusting the Lord to continue to move in the next few months and to continue providing in ways that only He can. Thank YOU! Each of YOU that has chosen to support us in this way. We are getting closer. We can't wait to receive the message that we have been matched! Please keep us and this specific referral in your prayers. We desire for it to be the best fit on both ends. Will you also pray for our hearts in this process that we would feel peace no matter what decision is made and that we will continue trusting and persevering as we wait to be matched with our child/children? Thanks for taking the time to stay updated on our progress in this process. We are thankful for the community that has chosen to stand, kneel and walk this journey with us. We love you all. Have a wonderful Thursday!
