We have BIG news!
We are adopting a child!
We are beyond excited and are doing everything we can to be prepared to welcome a beautiful new life into our home. As part of our adoption process, we have started a crowdfunding campaign. It may surprise you to hear that adoption-related costs can easily total up to $35,000 or more. This is why we have set a goal of [insert amount] to help ease the financial burden that often overwhelms adoptive parents.
Here is the story that lead us to make this decision.
Our adoption story starts with our childhood. Life was great for both of us as we were raised in Christian families, involved in our church families, and enjoying a wonderful childhood. Except for Valerie who at age three was diagnosed with a rare genetic disorder called Diamond Black Fan Syndrome. This caused my body to have blood anemia and a few genetic issues. At birth, I was born with a hole in my heart where it did not belong. At age three I had open-heart surgery to repair it. The rest of my childhood continued with blood tests and steroid medication which led me to live a very healthy young life. I continued on with my Christian education through college where I fell in love…or at least I thought I did. My ex-husband and I got married and after three years of marriage, we decided to try and get pregnant. These first three years were not easy for us, so we decided to move out of state for a new start. Once settled in our life in Vermont we decided to try and figure out why we were not pregnant yet. After a visit to my primary care doctor, an abnormal hormone test, and an appointment at the infertility specialist, I was told the news that would change my life forever, that I am not able to have biological children . After walking out of my appointment stunned and feeling like the world around me was falling apart, I slowly went into recovery mode. My lifetime dreams of becoming a mom were being ripped from me and there was nothing I could do. The next few years continued to be challenging as my Ex and I learned to cope with the news. I turned to God and dove deeper into my faith becoming a stronger woman in Christ. After three different Christian counselors, a year of me living in a lonely and loveless marriage my EX husband abanded me. My parents rescued me, moved me home, and helped me rebuild my life. God blessed me with an easy divorce and lots of family and friends who surrounded me with love and my life started to turn around.
While Val struggled to keep her head afloat and her dreams of a family alive, Ethan became a homeowner at age 18, focused on his work, and continued to pray that God would bless him with a wife and family. The journey was long and hard for both of us, but God finally brought our paths together. All it took was one short message on the Christian mingle dating app and it was love at first sight. We have been married for a year and feel very blessed to have found each other and long to have a family. This began our decision to answer God's call to adopt a child. We have chosen Bethany Christian Services as our agency and have applied for domestic infant adoption. And even though we have tightened our budget, eliminated all unnecessary expenses, and vacations we still need to raise $35,000 to make our dreams come true. Only Our Lord and Savior can move mountains….and we know he will. Therefore, we are asking our friends and families to help.
Pray, Pray and Pray…we need lots of prayers to make our dream a reality. Check our page often for updates and specific ways to pray.
Please consider donating to our cause. You can donate here on our adopt together page, and through fundraising events. Check your mailboxes and inboxes for more information.
Please Help our dreams come true…. together our God will move a mountain!
Ethan and Valerie Niemeyer…..Dad and Mom-to-be!
We hope that by inviting you into this process, you will see yourself as part of the community we hope to build around our child as he/she grows up.
Hello family and friends,
The Niemeyers have had a very exciting start to the year 2023. After being told last October that we would have to wait a full year to begin embryo adoption we entered the holiday season feeling depressed and sad. The Holidays were hard as we longed for the one thing we could not have...a child. But we leaned on God and each other to end 2022 feeling hopeful for the New Year. We decided to turn 2023 into a year of enjoying being a couple, traveling, and spending time together. At the begging of January, we enjoyed a vacation in Orlando Florida where we made some wonderful memories and were able to rest and relax. It was so nice to get away and focus on having fun in the sun! We left with smiles on our faces and arrived home to cold Michigan feeling ready for whatever God had planned for us this coming year.
What we had no idea was that God was changing our timeline of becoming parents and changing it in a big way. After receiving a second opinion and talking with a bone specialist about Val's low bone density, I ( Val ) was approved for Pregnancy! This meant that we can begin the process of our embryo adoption. What we thought was just a normal day turned into one of the best days of our lives. After two days of doctors sharing my medical records and reports and phone conversations being complete, we got the "Yes" we have been longing for.
As the next week went on we had lots to process as we continued to have conversations with our fertility clinic to learn about our next steps. And we are so excited to announce that we are officially beginning the embryo adoption process. We have made a deposit to our clinic and are searching for embryo donations. We are on the schedule to begin treatment in March for our first Embryo transfer/ implantation in April. We are very excited about this and completely overwhelmed with how God has changed our timeline. For years I was sitting outside the door that said motherhood on it. knocking at it, praying at it, and wishing God to open it. And then he did, just like he opened the door, lifted me up, and walked me through the door. Words truly cannot describe our feelings of pure joy and excitement.
As we move forward on this exciting journey we understand that there are still a lot of unknowns and we have a lot of questions for our medical team. But we are trusting God that he opened this door for a reason and are walking through with open arms ready for whatever God has planned for us. It may take us several embryo transfers to receive a successful pregnancy. Val also has been declared high risk for pregnancy because of low bone density and because of the heart surgery she had as a kid. We also have been told that we can try as many embryo transfers as we can afford to get a successful pregnancy. But my body will not be able to tolerate more than one pregnancy. Therefore at this time, we will have a small family...which is fine with us. We are just excited to finally have a chance to raise one of God's children!
With that being said our current steps our to find and pick embryos. There are several ways of doing this that we are using. We have created an account with the National Registry for Adoption to match directly with couples who are looking to have their embryos adopted. We also are looking into matching with embryos that our clinic already has approved. This is a big deal as we are choosing our child and praying that God leads us in this very big decision. Besides one of the biggest decisions of our life, Val also is changing her diet to prepare for fertility treatment. I am now on a no-red meat diet and am taking lots of vitamins to prepare my body for treatment. Because of my low bone density, the doctor has also recommended some diet changes and life changes to help increase my calcium levels. For anyone who has been on a diet you know how hard it can be. But for me, this is not just a diet but a life change. And I am willing to do whatever I have to do to protect our baby and be their mom for years to come!
Financially through God's provision, our hard work at saving last year, and the amazing donations from all our family and friends we have enough saved for at least 2 embryo transfers, possibly three. Therefore we are beyond grateful for everyone who helped us reach this point It is only by God's grace that we are able to make this happen. We are beyond grateful for every donation, popcorn, garage sale item that was donated, and dollar that was donated.
As we move forward in the next several months we ask for prayers. Prayers for God's guidance as we make important decisions. Prayers of protection over both Val and our future embryos. We believe an embryo is a baby so we ask that join in prayers over our future child/ren. That God will cover us with angel wings and guidance through this whole journey.
At this time we do not have any specific dates for treatment but as soon as we know we will update everyone. We are beyond grateful to you all.
Hello family and friends.
We hope you all had a wonderful summer and are enjoying the fall colors. The Niemeyers have had a busy few months and have some adoption news we want to share.
Let's start with the Challenging news:
As many of you know we did not pass our Homestudy last spring and have been on a pause waiting for things that are out of our control from our agency. Well over the summer we got no good answers from our agency and were just strung along causing more distrust between us and the agency, leaving us feeling like God had shut that door. But we got excited when he opened the second door of Embryo Adoption. September came and we spend lots of time at doctor appointments to get approved to carry an embryo. We have felt God open this door in so many amazing ways and has blessed us with quick appointments, knowledgeable doctors, and quick lab results. Then this past Monday came and we headed back to the fertility clinic to receive what we hoped was the all-clear for Val to carry a baby. But once again, God's plans are not always the same as ours and we left feeling heartbroken. The doctor informed us that Val's bone density is too low AT THIS TIME to carry an embryo. But he is extremely confident that in a year (Fall 2023), after taking meds and lots of calcium sublimates Val will be able to carry an embryo. So we left the doctor and headed home with a decision to make: stay with the agency and continue to wait for possible approval. Or leave the agency and go the medical route?
There is no sure answer on how God is going to make us parents, all we can do is trust God and follow his leading. We did not take the decision lightly and have spent many sleepless nights praying about it. But when God wakes you up and bonks you on the head with the idea of embryo adoption, you listen. So that is what we have chosen to do. We are leaving the agency with the hopes of receiving some of the money back that we paid them.
You may ask, why change routes now? One, because we did not know we would not pass the home study. Second, we did not know embryo adoption was an option a year ago. If we would have known we would have started this a year ago. But we did not know and are following God's lead in our journey. We are continuously learning that God's plan is bigger and better than ours, and all we can do is trust God with our future. Thirdly we feel we cannot trust our agency and even if we continue wtih them approval is not a guarantee and may be followed by more then a year of waiting. Therefore, we came to a fork in the raod and are changing directions bassed on Gods leading.
Hearing the news that we have to wait another year to even think about getting pregnant is devasting and has not been easy on either one of us. We feel like a rug has been pulled out from underneath of us and leaving us fallen and broken. This is especily hard on Val as she has been waiting for the news of Yes you will be a mom for 6 years now. The pain of infertility is real and beyond hard and we got kicked down hard. But with prayers and Gods help God will pick ourselves up and we will continue on this fight. Becouse we know that God ahs big plans for us, and that every good thing in life is worth fighting for. For the next year though we have to protect our heart. Which means with a deep sadness that we have packed up most of the nursery, and are pushing parenthood out of our minds. We trust God that someday we will be parents but understand that God is asking us to wait. So to make it easier this will be our last blog post....for a while.
But we do not want to leave you without sharing that we have raised a total of $23000. Although we spent just over $5,000 of that on our homestudy and fundraisers. We are excited that when God opens the embryo adoption door we will have enough to pay for it. Embryo adoption costs aproximitly $18,000, currently we only need $800 to reach that goal! We are beyond gratefull for everyone who helped us rais the money needed, We have personal contributed about half of what we raised. The rest came from all you participating in donating pop cans, cash donation, buying christmas ornaments, partcipitaing in our chilli cook off, buying frozen meals and donating thousands of items for us the sell on line and at our garage sales, and buying clocks from Vals dad. Every single one of you is a huge blessing to us and have played an important role in making our dreams come true. Please know that all these funds are sitting in a checking acount (seperal from our personal one) awaiting the day when we become parents, just like our child is waiting for us.
For the next year Val wil be doing everything she can to raise her bone density including taking hormones and suppliments. We are going to focus on being a couple and doing things we love like camping and traveling. We will finish our basment remodel (like all home imorovemnt projects its a slow process..lol) and spend lots of time praying and focusing on !our marriage so we can be ready to be called mom and dad ,when every God says it;s time.
What can you do? PRAY! Pray for Val as she heals and processes and continues on in this fiertility badle that seems to be never ending and for ethan as he is Vals support and encouragment through a long year of waiting. Pray that God will change something in our situation and strengthen Vals bones for pregnancy. Just PRAY!
We love you all and will update as soon as our situation changes, we wish you all the best! God Bless
Ethan and Valerie NIemeyer
Happy 4th of July, we can't believe how fast this year is going. Before we make a splash of 4th of July fun we wanted to share with you a very special fundraiser we are running. Val's dad has hand-made Beautifull wooden clocks. Made from cedar wood cut down from a local tree. My dad purchased the clock mechanization and did all the work himself. He has several styles for sale and we are selling each one for $125. These make a great gift and look Beautifull on any wall. If interested please email Valerie at [email protected] or text at (802)868-1007 for pictures and ordering details.
Adoption update and prayer request:
We are still in a home study pause as we continue to wait on our adoption agency to provide a parenting class we need to take. They do not know when it will be available but have stated they will give us a two-month notice so we are now looking at September for continued work on this. Please pray for us as we pray about other options and seek God's wisdom as we make decisions for our future family. We are still looking ahead with a hopeful attitude. While we wait and Pray we continue to live our lives and enjoy summer. We are excited to be camping in Silver Lake over the 4th of July, and then head up to Torch Lake for some fishing and paddling a few weeks later. We are enjoying our finished porch extension and love our outdoor eating area. Summer nights in the back ard have become some of our favorite moments of summer. We are continuing to raise money through Market place listings and our clock fundraiser and are continuing to put our owner saving towards our adoption as well.
Thank you all for the prayers and continued support as we continue to journey down this long and emotionally hard road. We appreciate you all and hope you all have a blessed 4th of July.
Ethan and Valerie Niemeyer
Good morning family and friends,
Ethan and I want to extend a huge thank you to everyone who donated items to our garage sales. We held two different sales and in just those two days we made $1342! This does not include any of the items we have sold on the Facebook marketplace. We do not have an actual total yet but we are confident we are between $1800 and $1900 and will be calculating our total this week. We feel very blessed and overwhelmed at how generous our community has been and how God has provided everything we need for our journey. We give God all the glory and thank each and every one of you for being a part of our adoption journey.
We want to take a moment to assure everyone that all our donation money goes into a separate checking account and is not counted as income for tax purposes. We put our own savings into the account each month and are continuing to pay our adoption agency fees each month from our own account. We are doing everything we can to raise the money but still live our lives and enjoy our time as a couple before becoming parents.
With that being said we hope you all enjoy your summer! The Niemeyer's have several camping trips planned, and lots of beach, paddle boarding, kayaking, fishing, and hiking adventures that we are looking forward to. We pray a blessing on each and every one of you and are beyond thankful for everyone one of you who is walking this journey with us and have become a part of our adoption village.
Please continue to pray that our agency will plan the parenting class we need to take in order to get approved. We are still waiting for the class to be available and are quite frustrated that their promise to have it ready by May has not been followed through with. We continue to wait for them so we can reopen our home study and get approved.
Thank you, and God Bless,
The Niemeyer's
Hello family and friends,
If you have been paying attention to the calendar, listening to the radio, or watching commercials you can't miss this week's Mothers Day. Therefore I am writing to remind everyone that Mother's day can be a painful time for many women.
While you gather with your families and celebrate the moms and children in your life remember that many women are hurting and in pain from the loss of a child, a mother, a miscarriage, infertility, or separation from a child due to military or divorce. All of these scenarios cause different hurt and pain in a women's life.
My journey of painful mothers' days started 5 years ago when I walked into the infertility client and was told " you will not be able to have biological children", and then a few weeks later with more pain when my grandmother passed away unexpectedly. Every year on Mother's day the pain of losing my grandmother gets a little easier, but the pain of infertility never goes away. Our adoption journey brings hope to a painful time of year but does not and will not take away the loss of the dream of becoming a biological mom.
Many don't understand this pain ( and that is ok) and want to do something to take it away. Truth be told there is nothing anyone can do, except show up emotionally. If you know someone who is hurting this Mother's day week, reach out to them and let them know you are thinking of them. Tell the single moms in your life they are doing a great job, send a word of encouragement, and just let the hurting women know that they are seen and heard. I am one of 8 women who suffer from infertility and many more who have lost a child. Our pain is real and it makes all holidays, especially mothers day extra hard. And when gathering with your families understand that hurting women may be quiet, or absent because of their pain, and that is ok. Ethan and I have started to tradition of doing what I love most on mothers day....camping. Someday we will share this tradition with our children. For now, we pack up the tent and camping gear and head to the state park for a weekend of rest, time with God, and prayer for our future family. Every family who walks the journey of painful Mother's days does it in their own way. So if you have a family member who is hurting please remember to be sensitive, and reach out. If you don't know what to say that is ok.....showing up and just being there to give a hug makes all the difference.
As this is a difficult week for me I am excited to share some good news with you all. Although the last few months have not been easy emotionally God has shown up in our fundraising goal in big ways. Through Market place listings, blog donations, and our own personal savings we have raised $14,168. This does not include the money we made at our garage sale this past weekend. On our first sale, we made $643 and will be continuing to sell high-priced items on Marketplace, and will be having at least 1 possible two more garage sales. Our next sale is going to be on Monday, May 30th ( Memorial Day). We are so excited that God has provided half our fundraising goal! God is so good and we give all the credit to him. We thank everyone who has donated money, pop cans, and garage sale items. Every last one of you is a part of our adoption village and we could not be more grateful...God has blessed us through you all.
Please pray for all the hurting moms this week, and continue to pray for our journey and fundraising goal.
Ethan and Valerie Niemeyer.....Dad and Mom-to-be!
