We have BIG news!
We are adopting a child!
Please take a few moments to read about our journey to parenthood.
As you know, asking for money is really hard, however, telling our story is even harder.
None of this is easy to talk about.
By “this”, we mean infertility.
We’ve struggled for a while about the best way to talk about infertility, because we know that in the grand scheme of things, we’re not unique. For every disappointment, there are so many other families than can relate.
So many couples struggle with infertility. People don’t talk about it or the challenges of adoption.
Generally, couples who desire to have a biological child try, and try, and try again, and once trying seems to fail, some people, like us, decide to shift their focus to adoption.
Let us take you back to the beginning, which started 5 years ago. After attempting in-vitro fertilization (surprise: it didn’t work) and with a lack of other options; we decided that more hormones were not a good idea. Hormones are funny things, and when you do IVF it’s like putting your foot on the break and the gas at the same time. If you have ever had the unfortunate pleasure (ugh) of giving yourself or your partner multiple hormone shots every day, you know what we mean. You also know the kind of pressure it can put on you and your partner.
After realizing that modern medicine wasn’t going to be the route for us, we began to pursue adoption. We felt strongly about trying to adopt a child out of the foster care system. You always hear that people only want to adopt babies, but we were open to an older child, too; if it was a good fit. We entered the experience with an incredible amount of enthusiasm and energy. Unfortunately, our involvement with our public adoption agency was nothing short of a disaster. Even as a seasoned social worker, Anna thought that she had a good idea of what to expect, yet, nothing prepared us for the challenges we experienced through this process.
In the midst of the two years with the agency, we had a few potential matches, but the process of matching is veiled, and there are multiple players. The rules are also different in all 88 counties of Ohio! After countless dead ends, we reached the end of our 2-year approval period. Due to the experience; we reluctantly opted to not renew. At the end, Anna was despondent, a little bitter, and honestly tired. Through all of this Rod was the voice of reason and sanity.
But, we knew in our hearts that there are kids out there that need us, and we need them too. We just couldn’t understand why it wasn’t working out.
Throughout this process, the one thing we have learned is that we don’t always have the final say. You may not be religious, or even spiritual, but there is a little thing that sometimes pushes you along even when you’re too exhausted to keep going yourself.
For us, that little thing was a chance encounter that Rod had with a woman at his office. Her prayers and encouraging words helped us decide to explore private adoption. This motivated us to keep trying and brought us to where we are today. We’re happy to say, we’re going to keep fighting.
After talking to several people connected to adoption in various ways, we were introduced to Adoption Circle, a private agency in Central Ohio. They have been amazing thus far, and we are confident that they are going to help us find our child.
There have been a lot of tears, (and lots of laughs–because, you have to) along the way. We are so thankful for all of you who have been on this roller coaster with us for a half decade .
So, one of the most difficult parts of adoption is the financial piece. Many people do not have a clear picture of how much private infant adoption costs. Word of advice: never say to someone, “just adopt,” because it can even be a challenge for those who are financially stable. Private adoption costs are a wide range, but typically land in the 25-30k. Because our journey has already taken many turns physically, emotionally, and financially, we determined that we would need help to achieve our dream of adopting. Our current fundraising goal is $25,000, but we will adjust this as needed. If you have questions about all of the associated costs, please follow this link. The funding platform we have chosen to use does allow for your donation to be tax deductible, which is a bonus that many other crowdfunding sites do not offer. If you want to know more about our process before you choose to donate, please don’t hesitate to reach out to us. We are happy to share our journey in more detail. We know not everyone is in a position to contribute financially, but if you have other talents that could be helpful to us on this journey please let us know! Positive thoughts, prayers and good vibes are welcome and appreciated.
We are beyond grateful for any support those of you reading this can provide, but at a minimum, hope this offers you a glimpse into how challenging the road to parenthood can be. If you know someone struggling, please share our story with them.
Ask them how they are doing.
But, please don’t take it personally if they don’t want to talk about it.
Give them the opportunity to share if they want, but also give them an out. Listening might be the greatest gift you can provide.
If you yourself are struggling, know that we are here for you and are sending love and prayers for your own journey.
We will keep our funding website updated with stories about the process. We will try to keep it informative and hopefully a little humorous so you keep coming back to share in our journey.
With Thanks & Love,
Anna & Rod
