We have some news, we are planning to adopt!
Mark and I always knew we wanted to have a family, but we had no idea of the heartbreak that was awaiting us. We sought out fertility interventions after a year and a half without a pregnancy. We were so hopeful that our issues would be resolved quickly but that was not the case. The next eleven years would be filled with doctor’s appointments, tests, surgeries, fertility treatments, and IVF. In 2020, after years of IVF, I finally became pregnant. We spent the next seven months soaking up this sweet time, planning for our little one, and creating a special nursery.
When I was 33 weeks pregnant, Mark and I were at the most beautiful baby shower thrown by our dear friends. The day was full of laughter and happiness. I remember feeling so loved and grateful to have people in our lives that wanted to celebrate this sweet baby. Later that night, our world would come crashing down when I went to do my kick count and realized he was no longer moving. We rushed to the hospital, and it was there that we heard the words that would change our lives forever. “I’m sorry, but he no longer has a heartbeat.” It was a moment we have both replayed over and over, and I wish there was a way to erase those words that shattered our hearts. Our son, Chasen James (CJ), was delivered on August 31, 2020. In the hospital, we were able to have him baptized, spend time memorizing his little face, and have professional pictures taken of him. These are memories that we will treasure forever, because it was the only time we had with our son.
Over the next four years, I would become pregnant three more times, and all three pregnancies would end in loss. The grief from these losses have compounded over the years, and have felt unbearable at times, but we never gave up hope that our family would one day feel complete. Mark and I have had endless conversations about next steps after CJ passed. We knew we wanted a family, and adoption was always a big part of those conversations. Mark was ready to adopt right away, but it was hard for me to let go of carrying my own babies. I prayed and prayed about this and took council from those around me. A wise friend once told me that pregnancy is a blip in the life of a child and what matters is the day-to-day moments of raising a child and building a family. The Lord has continued to work on my heart over the years by bringing people and situations into our lives that share the joy of adoption. It has made us realize that this is the path for us.
Throughout our years of trying to build our family the financial burden due to travel and lodging for fertility treatments and surgeries has also weighed heavily on us. We estimate we have spent over $65,000 during that time. It might surprise you to know that adoption related costs can total $60,000 or more. This is why we have set the goal of raising $50,000 to help ease the financial burden. We recognize that it’s a true privilege to receive any donation and we are truly humbled by your willingness to provide support to our family.
During this time of being a waiting family, we have continued to pray that the Lord would open doors for us to make adoption possible and fulfill our heart’s desire of having a family. We ask that you continue to pray with us during this process.
