Hi Friends: My sweet friends Melonie and Jeff Flavin need your support to help them adopt their two littles. Please read their story below and consider donating towards their adoption.
My name is Melonie Flavin and on December 19, 2018 I got a call from my aunt that two of her great-grandchildren had been left at a hotel with a drug addict after their mother had been arrested. They had witnessed it all and were still in a state of shock and disarray. My aunt asked if I could help her, and I immediately said yes. I had nothing. No diapers, no clothing, no toys, no car seat, I mean nothing. My husband and I felt led to keep them for Christmas to allow my aunt time to develop a strategy of care for them as it seemed their mother would be incarcerated for several months. We showered them with love and toys and more toys and then returned them on the 27th. We believed that we had fulfilled our commitment and returned to our home. However, I was wrecked by their response to having to leave us. Likewise, I was unnerved by my own feelings toward these children I had known for less than a week. We talked on the drive home and with our tree still up and all the joys of Christmas everywhere, we pondered on why were we feeling this loss? So, we began praying and asking the Lord for direction. Were we to keep them? ~Surely no, we are too old to be their parents. Is that really fair to them? For us? We were finally empty nesters! The more we prayed the more we were confident of only one thing, that we were to trust and step forward. Slowly albeit, but forward.
Little did we know just what we were stepping into. By January 8th, 2019, they were both back with us and have been ever since.
At the time they came to us we had been married for over 30 years with grown children in their late twenties and early thirties. We surely never exhibited parenting perfection, as I am certain they will attest to, but we perfectly tried our best. Yet we learned very quickly that we knew nothing about parenting children of trauma. Children who still only know how to live in fear and act out of that fear. Children who have seen things no person should ever see. Children who truly thought a bathtub was where you slept or hid. We are a work in progress, all of us and we try to do better than the day before. It truly is second level parenting.
Over the summer while in weekly therapy Addilyn to her therapist that she “wanted to be a Flavin”. They called me from the session and shared with me her desire. We had thought about it over the years that we wanted more than just guardianship but were waiting for a lead from somewhere and she presented it to us. Since then, we have proactively and diligently pursued the adoption process and are doing our best to cross the finish line.
To date with our funds (and gifts of two incredibly generous families who support our desire to see the children officially be Flavin’s too), we have spent close to $15,000 dollars. Due to further hearings with the Superior and Juvenile court system, we have basically run out of immediate funds and need to secure more in any way possible. Through our home study we were made aware of state funding for private adoptions and have applied. It would be minimal, but every little bit helps. We also have taken on extra jobs after our regular work schedules taking turns single parenting to get them completed. We have a duty to the Cam and Addi to ensure that we have done everything we possibly can to continue to love and protect them. Our greatest desire is to be obedient to the One who has called us so we know that we will have all we need to fulfill this process and have our littles finally be Flavin’s. Thank you for learning more about us and considering to support our endeavor.
