Jeremy and Rachel Smith

Updates

• Update 62

  

  Day 604. Adopt from Liberia. Tenacity, Gratitude and Hope. Keep…. …going.

  November 23, 2023
  I keep listening to these songs “Crazy Love” and “Breakthrough” by Chris Mcclarney. Here is what I have found. There must be something more, beyond familiar shores. Wake up my heart to see Shake my soul to breathe In what You ask of me Whisper peace Psalm 46 God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging. There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God, the holy place where the Most High dwells. God is within her,... Read moreshe will not fall; God will help her at break of day. Nations are in uproar, kingdoms fall; he lifts his voice, the earth melts. The LORD Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress. Come and see what the LORD has done, the desolations he has brought on the earth. He makes wars cease to the ends of the earth. He breaks the bow and shatters the spear; he burns the shields with fire. He says, “Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.” The LORD Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress. -nothing is impossible for God. -everywhere I look, I see little miracles when my hope is floating up to the level of my eyes and I know that God is moving me towards my daughters with each beat of my heart that he hears and each tear that falls from my face that he sees. -everything I know to be true logistically and historically says I will not see my Liberian daughters face to face before this year ends. -but that is still my hope. It is still my deepest hope to rescue them from the clutches of orphanism and place their feet on the ground of safety and peace our family offers as soon as possible and before 2024. -and I know that as the daughter of a King not moved by this world, He hears me on this hope. The God I serve who gave me the desire to adopt is not trying to make this harder for us. He knows my hope. He gave it to me on purpose, just as He gave the ferocity and tenacity to parent these children. -as that hope remains, I remain grateful to God for this opportunity to be their mother from here, on this side of that big ocean that stands between my hands holding theirs. Even if He does not grant this request of mine to stand on Liberian soil before this year ends, I will remain grateful. Grateful to be their mother from here. I will choose gratitude, even when I don’t want to and even when I am so angry and frustrated I can’t breathe. I will choose hope, even when the days of this year dwindle and the logistics of travel are near impossible. I will choose peace, even when the grief of time lost with no end in sight tries to consume me. In the face of the unknown and the uncertainty and the evil forces in this world that try so hard to break the childhood of these children, I will choose hope. Hope that surfaces no matter what. I am their mother today, and their mother every day from here forward, and nothing changes that. I love them the way I love all of my kids, and nothing waivers that, breaks that, discourages that or minimizes that. The ferocity and tenacity of that love is a gift from God. It’s an ability He gave me and a promise He keeps. While we walk these valleys of cost and time and politics and corruption dividing our family on 2 continents, I have a confident hope that this is almost done. I have a confident hope that if God chooses to put us in Liberia in the next 30 days, He can. I have peace that if my feet are not on Liberian soil before this year ends, it is because God has his reasons. My belief remains that any day that passes while my daughters remain legal orphans is an emergency that requires the rescue of adoption. My hope is that God chooses this one last miracle on my behalf to allow us to travel. Even if He does not, my deference remains to His wisdom, as does my gratitude for the chance to be their mother today. As does my resolve to just keep…. …going. I’m just saying that I know He can. Because nothing is impossible. The tenacity and ferocity by which God loves me is one that is capable of this one thing. Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” Mark 10:27 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. Romans 12:21 This whole idea of overcoming evil with good is a piece by piece project that ends with death alone. I hope that I can continue to build with the pieces of this life placed in my hands, and that in doing so, hope continues to surface in miraculous ways as I have seen with our adoption process so far. Thank you for being here. Keep…. …going.

• Update 61

  Day 603. Adopt from Liberia. Thank you “Help us Adopt”

  November 22, 2023
  We got a $7500 grant from Help Us Adopt to assist with travel expenses! Yay! I dropped our overall goals down on this site to reflect this gift. We are so grateful and so excited to get this news the day before Thanksgiving. We have heard another family just received travel dates last week to go to Liberia on January 18th, so things are happening, even though the Liberia elections just concluded and the holidays are here. We hope to get travel dates soon! It has been an “any day now” process for over a year. But we are hopeful it’s almost... Read moreover. Thanks for all of your encouragement and support. Stay tuned and Happy Thanksgiving!

• Update 60

  

  Day 601. Adopt from Liberia. Box of Hope.

  November 20, 2023
  So Finn the whale and Fernando the turtle are traversing the world with lots of other toys and goodies plus letters and pictures and “I promise we are coming to get you as soon as we can” laminated letters. Specifically, Finn and Fernando are for our Liberian born daughters, who wait patiently for us. We have other friends with letters and gifts in this box as well. Currently, there are 37 children residing at the orphanage where our kids wait. 37 kids without their families to celebrate Christmas. 37 little hearts of 37 little people who are waiting. Waiting for... Read moregovernment officials to do their jobs. Waiting for families to change their orphan status to sons and daughters. For a few weeks, they will wait for this box of gifts that has toys and books and crayons and paint sets and more than anything else, this box has a lot of hope stuffed in. Hope that all 37 kids need to feel before the year ends. Hope that keeps us moving forward against the wave of obstacles and challenges of time. Hope packed into a little box that gives us just a minute to be their parents. Thanks to the guys at the FedEx store for your patience and understanding, and solidarity with our nausea on the price of shipping. Dear future Liberian daughters, We are doing all we can do. We hope you feel the hope we stuffed in this box. We miss you. Jeremy and Rachel Smith

• Update 59

  

  Day 587. Adopt from Liberia. Write every day.

  November 6, 2023
  Every day we miss them. Every day we hope for news. If you know me, you are asking me each time you see me if I have news. Because you are hopeful and you are aware and you are sensitive and acknowledge my plight and my heart in this fight. If you know me well, you choose silence on this topic unless I speak first. Because you know I am boiling over, right at the edge of losing it. Right at the cliff of screaming and crying in public. Right at the moment of holding my breath waiting for the courage... Read moreto take the next breath and just keep…. …going. Little problems matter too. Christmas is still coming and birthdays for the kids under our roof today are still fun and still important. The Noonday sales help me and others, so it is easy to pour into. The phill the box textile drives help me and others and is easy to pour into. But what happens when I’ve poured everything I have out, and it is still not enough to bring them home. I am powerless here. The kingdoms and principalities of this world hold them hostage in a place I cannot reach. That is more than maddening. It’s a criminal act. An act that has no accountability and no resolution until one day the damn that holds back this paper pregnancy process just gives way. And just like when in an actual pregnancy, water breaks and we urgently move. Because it’s a definite then. My husband told me when my water broke with middle as I stood in parking lot scared we weren’t ready, scared my unborn baby was not ready, the train was moving and we are on it, so let’s just go inside. You have no idea how badly I need the water to break and the train to move for this international adoption. I can’t do anything else anymore, that my thoughts are not on my Liberian daughters’ safety. I can’t be anyone else but the transcontinental mother of 5 failing as their mother, again, on day 587. Every day they are not here is a day they are failed by me. Every day they wonder if we are still coming, is a day their hearts doubt me. In acknowledgment of that loss, all I can do is write. Write something as a token of proof to myself and to them that I was willing to try anything. I just don’t know what to do next. Day 587, of adopt from Liberia, you haunt me. But I will not be overcome by you. I will not be paralyzed by you. I will still keep…. …going, One day my counter will stop going up and these days of building something to make this adoption possible will cease. On that day, it will be like they were born. And it will be like I have been delivered from this torment of helplessness and hopefulness. As we wait for that deliverance, thank you for your words of encouragement. Thank you for not really understanding, but always maintaining a solidarity I depend on more than you know. Thank you for your moments of silence. Thank you for your actions of support. Thank you for your nod of approval. Thank you for your grace extended to our family. Thank you for the support we asked for and the encouragement we needed. I don’t know if we are almost there or not. I only know that no matter how many days are left on my counter of days to complete this Adopt from Liberia project, it is nice to not be alone.

• Update 58

  Even if He does not… Day 585. Adopt from Liberia.

  November 4, 2023
  Even if He does not…it’s a powerful verse and a powerful idea. It’s a sentence of submission from a man following God amidst captivity. It’s a calm surrender, but a determined one. Even if He does not… Can that phrase be honest in me? Can I speak those words as their mother and His daughter simultaneously and mean it? Even if He does not…. But why would He not? What is wrong with my request to see my Liberian daughters by Christmas? Even if He does not… What if it is not safe for our family there, and that is why the timing changes? But could... Read moreHe not repair that as well? Could He that part the seas for Moses, not be fully capable to part these seas for me? Even if He does not… Who will I be, if He does not? Will I curse Him for abandoning us in this endeavor? Will I question His power and existence over this one thing? Will I be filled with hatred and grief and regret for all the doors we walked through to see these last doors close? Even if He does not… Will I question the task He asked me to complete? Will I change my resolve on the importance of adoption as it parallels the gospel? Even if He does not… It’s a scary verse. It’s an terrifying idea as a parent who is all in, waiting on the powers of diplomacy and control to permit my children to be claimed by the freedom we are giving them as our daughters. While we wait, with nothing left to complete but backup fundraising I hope we won’t be even need, all I can keep repeating is this 2 verses, and continually contemplate what each of them means. But our citizenship is in Heaven… “But our citizenship is in heaven. And we eagerly await a Savior from there, the Lord Jesus Christ,” ‭‭Philippians‬ ‭3‬:‭20‬ ‭NIV‬‬ Even if He does not… “But even if he does not, we want you to know, Your Majesty, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up.”” ‭‭Daniel‬ ‭3‬:‭18‬ ‭NIV‬‬ As an American, I should be able to easily adopt these 2 Liberian orphans. There is a reason the evil forces in this world keep interfering with their safety as our daughters. As we pray to God on behalf of our daughters for completion and rescue and travel dates and financial miracles and all the things we keep asking for, I want you to know that Even if He does not answer me the way I want Him to this week, in wanting to receive travel dates before the holiday season begins (and everyone on both sides of these international borders use that as an excuse not to work on adoptions), I will still be obedient to the Creator of the Universe and will still continue to pursue these children for as long as I am breathing. Even if He does not, we will praise Him anyway. It will not be easy to choose that path of obedience after every door for their adoption swung open so quickly, and the last 2 doors seem bolted shut. But because our citizenship is in Heaven, even if He does not grant us this once Christmas wish we have held all year, we will keep…. …going. Because it’s not about us, and it’s not about me. And my earthly maternal instincts do matter to God in ways that He created and He understands. I know He hears me. And one day, He may move everything between us and these 2 little girls, but even if He does not, I will still praise Him. Even if He does not… Keep…. …going.
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